Flashback Monday: “Poisoning the Genius” from ME STUFF

poison-symbol1Last week, a brand spanking new book collecting forty of my posts from this site was released! To commemorate the release of ME STUFF, I’m going to be sharing some of the posts that made the cut in the book each Monday. I’m really proud of the book  and I hope you will check it out.

Here is the beginning of one of the works, “Poisoning the Genius”:

I want to say this at the start and I want it be clear to all who read this that I had no intention of killing my professor.

However, I’m certain if things had turned out worse that fateful night, some of my fellow students would have sold me down the river. I can picture them even today, accusingly pointing their finger across the courtroom at me. “There he is! That is the man who did it! That is the monster!”

The funny thing is there is actually a precedence for poisoning teachers in my family. Back when my grandmother was a principal at monthly meetings one of the heavier set teachers used to eat all of the snacks before the other teachers had a chance. My grandmother, being my grandmother, decided that she was going to send a “subtle” message to that teacher.

At the next full staff meeting, my grandmother brought in “special” brownies. Oh, they were fine. Perfectly fine… except for the biggest piece which was filled to the brim with laxatives.

That teacher called in sick the next day.

You can read the rest of the post on this site here. OR, better yet, you can grab a copy of ME STUFF. The eBook version of the book is only $1.99 (here on Amazon) and in print for only $8.99 (here on Amazon).

But wait, that’s not all!  Two lucky readers on GoodReads.com will win an autographed copy of the book. Here is the info below. Enter today!

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Me Stuff by Scott D. Southard

Me Stuff

by Scott D. Southard

Giveaway ends July 15, 2014.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter to win

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ME STUFF (my new book) is out today! More info! Enter to win an autographed copy!

Me Stuff, front cover

I’m happy to announce today the release of my new book Me Stuff!

When I began this site three years ago, I never thought I would be releasing a book like this or that even people would be interested in my little blog and ramblings. And yet, here we are and I can’t wait for you to check out this fun collection. I’m really proud of it and it has a little bit of everything, containing 40 popular entries. A little humor, a little romance, a little song and dance.

It is exclusively available via Amazon.com. The print copy is only $9.99 and the eBook version is just $1.99! You can find Me Stuff here.

To help celebrate the release of Me Stuff, two lucky readers on GoodReads.com will win an autographed copy of the book. The sweepstakes is through July 15. You can enter by clicking below.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Me Stuff by Scott D. Southard

Me Stuff

by Scott D. Southard

Giveaway ends July 15, 2014.

See the giveaway details
at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Good luck to all of the entries!

Here is the description of the book from the back cover:

Thieves, psychics, evil poets, mad men, car companies, literary greats, tornadoes, models, vasectomies, bankers, children, Satanists, princesses, truckers, comics, rock stars, strippers, superheroes…

Me Stuff is a collection of some of the most popular blogposts from Scott Southard’s writing site “The Musings & Artful Blunders of Scott D. Southard.” Made for both the fan and the newbie, Me Stuff has something for everyone… Well, except for those who don’t like entertaining stories. This book can’t help those people.

If you have enjoyed this site in the past, I hope you will grab a copy of my new book  (here) and maybe even tell a friend. And, as always, thank you for reading. This book wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for the support of readers like you. Thank you!

A Jane Austen Daydream on (blog) tour! September 1-12!

A Jane Austen DaydreamToday it was announced that my book A Jane Austen Daydream will be taking part in a blog tour this September (1-12) sponsored by Historical Fiction Virtual Book Tour! Very cool!

On their page for the upcoming tour (which you can visit here), you can check out reviews for the book, an excerpt and more information.  I look forward to seeing you out their in the virtual world of tomorrow… about someone who lived 200 years ago. LOL.

Cheers!

 

Thank You eBook Readers!

An Illustration from AustenNow that was a cool Valentine’s Day weekend! The publisher of my novel A Jane Austen Daydream (Madison Street Publishing) had it as a free eBook for two days on Amazon. Over the weekend, I was able to see my novel top a few genre lists on Amazon and almost break the top 100. Wow!

If you are one of the many that grabbed a copy of my book, I would first like to say “thank you.” I hope you like it! The second thing I would like to add is… well…

See, to make it in this very congested world of writing there are primarily three possible paths to success for today’s authors. The first is sheer luck; the second is you know someone (agent, publisher, etc.); and the third is word of mouth. I am aiming for the third option. So if you downloaded a free copy of my book, and enjoyed it, would you help?

Here are some easy options that you might consider:

  • Write a review of it on GoodReads or Amazon.
  • Tell a friend.
  • Gift it to someone.
  • Choose it for your book club.
  • Write about it on your blog, or review it on the site.
  • Share it on Twitter or Facebook.
  • Recommend it to your local library or bookstore for stocking on their shelves.

And those are just the quickest and easiest options I came up with off of the top of my head. You might have a better option I might not have considered. Whatever the case, I would love for more readers to find my novel.

Again, thank you for making my Valentine’s Day so memorable (like this moment below). Memorable moment

A shout-out to my 1100 followers and a request to my readers!

ElsaThis weekend I passed 1100 followers on my blog. That is awesome! As many of you know who have been following  my blog for a while I usually do something silly when I reach a new 100 milestone.

Well, I did have one planned for this time. In a blatant overreach in self-promotion I was going to rewrite the lyrics to the popular song “Let It Go” from the movie Frozen to be all about my writing and posts. A total ego trip… in snow.

It would have been epic and very embarrassing. In other words, perfect. But I have decided to do something different. Actually, I’m writing to you my readers.

I’m preparing a book for you guys! It will be called Me Stuff  and it will be a collection of some of my more popular personal posts. My hope is to be done with the production of the book sometime in March.

Do you like my blog? Do you check it often? Do you have a favorite post? Why do you keep coming back? See, the thing is I want to know!

I would like to include quotes from readers of my site as part of the marketing around the book! Some might make their way onto the cover, most will appear on the future page for the book and any marketing I might do around it. Readers speaking to other readers is how I view it.

If you would like to say something about the site, my writing, etc., for Me Stuff that would wonderful. You can e-mail me here at AJAD.Southard@gmail.com.

I look forward to sharing this book with you. And thank you again for supporting my site!

Charging the Melancholy Dragon: The Down Bits in Writing Today

Bugs Bunny in CasablancaBeing a writer can be… depressing.

This is really not surprising and most that work in the arts feel this to a certain degree, because you are putting a piece of your soul out there for the world to see and judge.

And everyone judges.

Yet, for an author there is something about writing that makes it seem so, so much more personal.

It’s probably because a story begins in one’s mind and resides there for months to years, until that fateful moment when a writer finally hits “print” on their keyboard or “send” in that first e-mail. And when you consider that most authors are introverts to a certain degree to being with.… Well, it just spells depressing doom, doesn’t it?  Yes, this all seems completely explainable, so why does it affect all of us so much?

Because creativity is all illogical! It’s on a completely different side of the brain from logic! Creativity resides with emotion and once I am ready myself to show or talk about a book, I usually expect to be disappointed and a little down. This is not me being a glass-half empty kind of guy; it’s just the nature of being a writer, especially in today’s overly-congested market of authors peddling their wares.

Yes, we writers when we are young to the field all dream of accolades and awards and long lines of readers desiring autographs at the local bookstore, but that doesn’t always happen. The chance of that happening to any of us is the equivalent of winning the lottery. Maybe three lotteries… back to back… in one day… and then getting hit by lightning while picking up the winnings.

These are the two most important lessons that get me through the rough authoring patches… Continue reading

Working The Audience: A Very Useful Writing Trick

On the StageI am a little bit of a helpless romantic.

For those who read my novel A Jane Austen Daydream that is not at all surprising. And before I met my wife I thought of my writing as a gateway to the heart.

I was one of those fools that bought into the lie of the romantic novels and the romantic comedy films. You see this plot twist all the time! That grand gesture that makes a person reconsider another in a different light. Oh, it is a great idea in a story, but we all know, honestly, it goes against how people are wired in the real world.

Short stories with hidden messages (and not so hidden ones), books, and I still squirm to remember the poetry. I have admitted a lot of embarrassing stuff on this site, but this is one of those few memories I still want to crawl into a cave and live out my remaining days because of. Yup, just the hint of it makes me want to become a hermit.

I, Scott Southard, was the creator of bad love poems. And I have sent them, strategically left them around, and even mailed them once anonymously in the hope that it would make another stop and see me as hotter (as some kind of light rock classic kicks on in the background like in a bad movie). In the end it never worked… and, by the way, the recipient of the anonymous love poems didn’t even figure out they were from me until I said something! Ouch!

All those bad memories aside, there is something to be said for the importance of an audience. I’m not just talking about the readers all writers dream to have, I mean that more enigmatic dream of a reader. The one we hope will find our work, the one in the back of our mind that drives the creation forward. They demand the story. What many don’t realize is that dream reader can be a tool, and can help over many different steps in the creative process if used right. Just be sure to leave the poetry at home… Continue reading

Discover the strange new book MAXIMILIAN STANDFORTH AND THE CASE OF THE DANGEROUS DARE

Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare, Cover“If you like your supernatural books where reality mixes with the impossible, the inexplicable, then this is the book for you…. It is beautifully written.” A five-star review from GoodReads.com

Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare  is a book pretending to be a gothic Victorian-period mystery. From it’s dashing hero to foggy London streets and abandoned castle, all the markings are there… but hidden underneath is a book questioning the very nature of storytelling.

For a limited time more the book is on sale on amazon (here). You can find the eBook for only $1.99 and the print version (my original vision for the work) for only $9.89. Here is the description of the mad tale:

The cursed and foreboding McGregor Castle is the most terrifying and haunted location in all of the British Empire. Only a brave (or foolish) soul would consider visiting it, let alone staying within its walls for five days. In other words, a perfect dare for a man like Maximilian Standforth!

Maximilian Standforth, famed playboy aristocrat and private detective, is a genius with dangerous tastes. With Bob (his trusty carriage driver, biographer, and body guard) and Maggie Collins (actress, spy, and maid) by his side, Maximilian will experience horrors and madness unlike any seen before. For it is at McGregor Castle that the team will discover more than they ever could imagine in this very experimental and genre-breaking thriller.

Here are some more options to learn about the work on this site:

I hope you will take this opportunity to check out this novel. If I can promise anything it is that you will be surprised. For nothing in the castle is at seems…

“If you have read any Jasper Fforde, imagine him writing whilst tripping on acid.” A reader from amazon.co.uk

“Go get it!” Julie Valerie’s Book Blog gives A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM 5-Stars! Review, Interview and Excerpt.

A Sketch of JaneBook reviewer and book blogger extraordinaire Julie Valerie has just given a wonderful review for my novel A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM. I am really flattered by it (and a little overwhelmed). Here is an excerpt from the review about the book:

A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM by Scott Southard, a fictionalized account of Jane’s life, is a book that should be placed on the shelf of every book-loving fan of Jane Austen because she’s absolutely “alive” on the pages of this book. She walks, talks, dreams. Her family (especially her older sister, Cassandra) moves about influencing Jane and the events around her. You’ll find a hauntingly accurate reading from a gypsy who predicts Jane will never die. (Through her words, I believe she is immortal.) And with Jane, you’ll explore love and explore deeper the age-old question: Did Jane ever find love in her own life?

I also gave an interview for the site that you can read below the review. We talk not just about the writing of the book, but also about my blog and my other books. Here is an excerpt:

Like the voice, I also had to walk a line between how “Austen” to go in it. Yes, the book can be considered a treasure hunt for the Austenities, but I also like to imagine that it is unique enough to be entertaining for those outside the Darcy fan clubs. At the heart of it, it is still my book, and I couldn’t help putting in fun post-modern twists and turns (including one very new literary surprise which I won’t ruin here).

You can read the review, the interview and an excerpt from the novel on Julie’s website here. I hope you will check it out.

A Jane Austen DaydreamIf you would like to learn more about A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM, you can do so on this page for the book (https://sdsouthard.com/a-jane-austen-daydream/). A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM is available via Amazon (http://amzn.com/0983671923) where you can find it for the low price of $3.99 for eBook and $13.46 for print.

A Haiku For My 800 Followers-

A Tree By MonetToday, I just passed 800 followers on my site!

Thank you!

To celebrate this fun moment I created this haiku.

800 kind souls

Inspire this poor writer

Better than caffeine-

I hope you continue to enjoy my writing blog and books!