The Stories of Scott D. Southard

  • In Jerry’s Corner
  • A Jane Austen Daydream
  • Permanent Spring Showers
  • Megan
  • Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare
  • The Dante 3
  • Me Stuff
  • Man Behind the Curtain
  • September 26, 2012

    Writing About Genius: Discussing Authors on a Blog

    I tolerate Garrison Keillor, but I am not sure how much I like him.

    While I am impressed that he can write a two-hour show each week (and that is an accomplishment, make no mistake), I never found his fiction to be very good– comforting, yes; good, no. When planning for a trip to Italy with my wife, I picked up a bunch of his novels for all of the driving from tourist site to tourist site.  Well, on day two of the trip, I gave his books to another traveler, and picked up some new books at a bus stop… Yeah, that says everything right there.

    So why do I bring up Mr. Keillor? Frankly, I don’t think he helps the image of English majors and readers on his show. English majors (and I will include librarians with us since they get attacked as well) in his opinion seem to always live a life of illusion, false grandeur.  Making us almost something to be pitied or laughed at… and they laugh every week.

    Yes, English majors really don’t serve much of a purpose in the economy, no business manager has ever demanded an HR department to hire a new English major. When it comes to the American dream of moving up ladders and finding success, English majors are on the outskirts; because, honestly, our dreams are different. (more…)

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  • September 24, 2012

    Missing My Vonnegut Moment

    Listen:

    There is a piece of family mythology that I might have made up.

    My grandmother was friends with Kurt Vonnegut’s first wife’s college roommate. I know that is not much, but here me out; there is a chance that my favorite writer (the genius behind Slaughterhouse-Five and others works of literary greatness) might have been aware of my family.

    Why is this important? Well, in 1999, Kurt Vonnegut released a book of his uncollected short stories (Bagombo Snuff Box). Many of these stories were uncollected for a good reason; being the product of a struggling writer just looking for a sale in the booming short story market of the 1950s. Yet, there is one story in it of particular importance to me.

    It is called “The Runaways” and it stars a family named the Southards.

    Now, I know there are other Southards out there in the world. Heck, I’ve even found other writers out there with the same name as me (first and last), but with that slight connection, who is to say he might not have remembered meeting my grandmother by chance at that dorm room before a date (and my grandmother was quite the looker then) or had seen her referenced in a letter? Whatever the case, before anyone else does, I am staking my claim:

    The great Kurt Vonnegut was inspired to use the name Southard in that story because of my grandmother.

    There I typed it, and because it is the internet (and there are no falsehoods on the internet) and Vonnegut is no longer around to argue about it, it must be true.

    So it goes. (more…)

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  • September 20, 2012

    Happy Snoopy Dance! 100 Blog followers and 1000 Twitter followers!

    Just a quick blog post to thank everyone for supporting my writing. It is really appreciative. and I have not stopped smiling all day.

    When I began this blog, I hoped that my writing might find an audience, but honestly and selfishly, I was doing it to revive my own writing voice. (I’ve written a few times about this, so I won’t bore you with it here since you might know the tale, but you can check out this post for more info on my dramatic initial thoughts around the site). Yet, now here we are; nine months and almost 15,000 views later.

    For the new readers and followers, feel free to look around, kick the tires, see what you like. I have some fiction (finished and new), short stories, and even some radio comedy. All for your pleasure.

    I hope you enjoy my writing as much as I enjoy creating it. Thanks again!

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  • September 12, 2012

    Five Things I Am Into Right Now, September 2012

    Autumn is around the corner, and in my neck of the woods the leaves are just starting to change colors and my son is already talking about his Halloween costume.

    He wants to be The Flash this year, but next year he wants to be Captain America with a shield which he threatens to throw around; so it’s good for everyone (especially the dog) he is The Flash this year. My daughter is Princess Leia, because I thought it would be cute and she is too young to argue; and I made sure to pick it up before the mom got a chance to say no. Yes, I am happy with this action on my part, and I will do it again in a heartbeat.

    Okay, I must admit I skipped on my list last month. And that is okay, seriously, I had no time, focusing most of my attention on writing my book while listening to Fiona Apple. Yeah, Fiona’s new CD (The Idler Wheel…) is definitely becoming my mental soundtrack for this opus, but I already talked about the CD enough on this site. You don’t need to read me praising it again… Oh, what the heck– it is my favorite CD of the year so far and you should buy it.  Onto my list: (more…)

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  • September 11, 2012

    Greetings, My 97 Followers! Come In & Say Hi!

    One of the wonderful surprises I never considered before starting this blog up in January was the collecting of followers.

    (For those that are not in the know, you can become a follower of a site/blog like this by adding your e-mail into the box on the left above the “Good Reads” option, and below the “other Sites of Interest.” You will get an e-mail each time an article is posted, or if you are a member of WordPress you can catch up on the blogs you follow via your own main WordPress login page.)

    Since January, I have collected 97 followers, and it is… okay this may sound like an everyday adjective but truly I mean it when I say it is “awesome.”

    So why is this so much fun for me, my followers? Because frankly how diverse all of you are and how cool and passionate each of you are about your own interests.

    I check out my followers’ sites from time to time and I have everything from musicians to dancers to photographers to writers (fiction to nonfiction) to fellow hip parents to even one person who is checking off the points on her bucket list.

    Yes, when I have free time, I occasionally visit each of your sites, wondering what is going on, happy to know that this person enjoys my writing. You guys help the old ego in a major way!

    Anyway, to celebrate the fact I am almost at 100, I thought it might be fun to have a post like this… Consider it a cyber “meet and greet.”

    Let’s do it like this:  In the comments section below, if you want, leave a comment and description about your own site (if you have one), introduce yourself to the other followers and readers (who knows? other followers might join your site as well). Share with us your dream for your own site. I would love to hear from you.

    And thanks, of course, for following my site and writing! Cheers!

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  • September 3, 2012

    Starting School

    “Can you believe our firstborn is starting school?” My wife asked me this question a few days ago, her eyes going wide as she said it, and it ridiculously enough took me completely by surprise.

    My son is about to start Begindergarten, which is a cute way of saying an “Early Fives” class. He is going to attend it in an elementary and he will be there all day just like all of the bigger kids, using their same cafeteria and their playground (not at the same time, of course). My wife and I were so focused on getting him into the right school in our area for the last eight months that I didn’t realize until recently how much this change meant for all of us in our little family and for him.

    This was about to be something new…

    In preparation of this first day over the weekend we drove him to his new school and allowed him to play in the playground for about an hour. While he loved playing in the playground (trying everything he could), I kept noticing things, my parental eye kicking in.

    • Who was it that left these empty beer cans here on the playset? Will these people who would drink at a kids’ playground be around the school? Heaven forbid, or will they actually be attending?
    • Why are there so many weeds?
    • And are those soccer nets going to be fixed?
    • Is that rust?

    Yes, while this playground is better than anything I had growing up (and this is a great school district), I still was catching everything I possibly could. This could be a super power of mine. A lame super power, but still a power. You can call me “Protective Dad.” And I am here to shake my head and wag my finger at others! Irresponsible people of the world be warned! Protective Dad is among you now! (more…)

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  • August 29, 2012

    Falling Out of Step: A High School Marching Band Farewell

    Last night I had a dream that my yard and driveway were taken over by a marching band. I can’t explain how it happened and why they chose my little house to park in front of and warm up their instruments by but there they were and they were everywhere; the sounds of the horns and percussion seemed to engulf every room.

    I went to my front porch, now fully aware that I was in a dream, and watched transfixed as these high schoolers acted as if it was perfectly natural for the drum line to practice by my tree, the saxophones to tune each other on my sidewalk, the flutes to gossip while sitting on the edge of my porch, their feet dangling and kicking over the precipice. Even the color guard was there, stretching and practicing their throws and catches on the street in block formation.

    In the dream I walked through the crowd of kids, feeling very much the adult, and found a surprised parent, I’m not certain why she was surprised, she just was. I asked what school is this? Why are they here? She didn’t answer my question, only asking a little hesitantly if it was okay.

    I smiled and said it was great. And then I woke up. (more…)

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  • August 20, 2012

    My Wife Hates Steely Dan

    So often when you speak to married couples you hear of the sacrifices that they have given for the sake of the marriage. Bad habits disappear, strange heirlooms from the past go into storage.

    Luckily, for me my wife really married me for who I was and didn’t expect me to change…

    Oh wait…

    She did want one thing.

    My wife hates the music of Steely Dan.

    “Reelin’ in the Years”

    I grew up on the music of Steely Dan. My dad loves this band, I can’t remember a time really when Countdown to Ecstasy or Pretzel Logic wasn’t playing while he was working in the lawn or around the house.

    Over a decade ago I actually got him tickets to see the band live. And when he injured his leg, I gave him copies of their entire discography to help pass the time. They have always been a go-to possibility around my dad and presents… Other than Steely Dan and the work of Kurt Vonnegut, he is difficult to shop for, to be honest. (more…)

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  • August 16, 2012

    Really? Wow! What?!: Dealing With Negative Comments on a Blog

    This morning I woke up to a stranger calling me a moron.

    See, I have an iPhone app for my WordPress blog, and I get notifications when a comment comes in. It rarely happens that I get a comment in the late evening, so I haven’t bothered to change my settings out of sheer laziness. Well, this morning I did get a comment waking me up; actually two came in but they were from the same person, so I think of them as one. The first said what I had written was “bullshit” and the second called me a “moron.”

    Do you like irony? The piece that he was commenting on (here) was about how Bruce Wayne has anger issues and could do more with his billions of dollars to help people if he really wanted to do than becoming Batman; so the fact that someone with the screen name of “Bruce Wayne” called me a moron and swore at me, kind of proved my point… Okay, maybe it’s not that funny a point but I think it is at least a little interesting to note, right? (more…)

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  • August 15, 2012

    The Nat King Cole Inside My Head

    I am obsessed with The Beatles, I adore Belle and Sebastian, I’ve seen They Might Be Giants five times in concert, and I can’t stop playing the new Fiona Apple CD… but Nat King Cole is the musical comfort food for my soul.

    I have read a few biographies about him over the years, and as amazing of a life he had, it’s always hard for me to connect him to his voice. Frankly, his voice is so engrained into my own life, it is hard to think that it once even belonged to someone else, as strangely as that sounds. I don’t feel his struggles against racism in his career and his growth from jazz pianist to just a singer fronting a band in a studio, lost in the business of just singing singles hoping for a hit, when I listen to his music.

    I hear my own life in his voice, in his performing, making each recording I adore something akin to a special gift. (more…)

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