Episode Eight: Time Out Of Mind

Episode 8 of

Time Out Of Mind,

The Sequel to

The Dante Experience

“Dinner With the Folks”

OPENING CREDITS

Scene 1

SOUND: Of heaven and a computer typing.

MICHAEL: Ok, I have some bad news…

SOUND: Of computer stops typing.

MICHAEL: I’ve been searching for three hours now and I can’t find our group of heroes. Ever since Adam threw that rock and hit the time machine, our team has been lost in time… They could be anywhere.

KELLII: Can we play another game now?

REPAIR ANGEL: I have Stratego.

KELLII: Yeah, get that one. Anything better than Monopoly. Monopoly just doesn’t work for two people.

MICHAEL: Can you two please leave?

KELLII: I want to wait and see what happens next?

MICHAEL: What happens next? I’ll tell you what happens next! Your father shows up and kicks my…

REPAIR ANGEL: Hey, let’s watch the language.

KELLII: So he is a little protective.

MICHAEL: He threatened me for just taking you on a date!

KELLII: See, protective.

REPAIR ANGEL: Wait until he sees the website you created.

MICHAEL: Argh!

KELLII: Website?

MICHAEL: Ok, will you both shut up!… Now your holiness, we can get back to important information. Alison is still with the binkies. She seemed to have jumped right into the role of being a tyrannical leader. She has brought the binkies back to her parents’ house so she can get a change of clothing.

Scene 2

SOUND: Door opening.

ALISON: Hi, Mom, I’m home.

MOM: Honey, where have you been?

ALISON: I was on a picnic with Robert.

MOM: Oh, that’s nice… (Closer) Oh my.

ALISON: Mom, these are my friends, the evil binkies. Come on in guys.

SOUND: Of wall being smashed in as they walk in.

SMAUG: Hello puny Mrs. Peters.

FOURTH DRAGON: (Growls).

MOM: I don’t think I’ve cooked enough dinner for your friends.

ALISON: It’s ok, I think they have eaten.

SMAUG: And we’ll eat more human scum before the end of the evening (Evil laugh).

ALISON: (Joins in laughing too)

MOM: What an odd sense of humor you all have. Well, we’re just having pasta.

ALISON: Pasta! I love pasta!

MOM: I know!

ALISON: I just came home to change clothes before leaving again. Just a minute.

SOUND: Of Alison running up stairs.

MOM: (Awkward) Ok…. So you three are binkies?

SMAUG: (awkward) Yes… we are.

MOM: (Awkward) That must be interesting…

SMAUG: (Awkward) Yes, yes, it is.

MOM: (Ah, awkward) What’s that like?

SMAUG: (Awkward) The hours are good.

FIFTH DRAGON: The killing is fun.

SMAUG: (Excited, slightly less awkward) Gotta love the killing, the destruction, the skill in destroying dreams and hope.

FOURTH DRAGON: What do you do, Mrs. Peters?

MOM: I’m in mortgages.

SMAUG: So you know what we mean.

DAD: Hi, Honey, I’m… Dear God!

MOM: Oh, hi dear.  These are some of Alison’s friends, honey.

SMAUG: Hello, Mr. Peters.

DAD: Ah, hello… Where is our daughter?

MOM: Upstairs.

DAD: I think I’m going to have a little talk with her. (Goes upstairs).

SOUND: Of Dad going upstairs.

MOM: (Awkward) He’s just going to have a talk with her.

SMAUG: (Awkward) Yeah, he said that.

MOM: (Awkward) Chatting, father to daughter and such.

SMAUG: (Awkward) Must be nice.

MOM: (Awkward) Yeah…

PAUSE. FEEL THE AWKWARDNESS OF THE SILENCE.

MOM: (Some coughing)

 Scene 3

SOUND: of a little music playing in the background as Alison scurries around room trying to find clothes to wear.

DAD: Alison, I allowed the biker gang you dated. I even let you have Will for a friend. And I totally looked the other way in regards to Robert, but honey, they are binkies! They are another species and frankly, they aren’t supposed to exist.

ALISON: It’s not like that. Don’t worry, Dad.

DAD: I’m supposed to worry. I’m your father. It’s my job to say something when my daughter brings home three binkies, I’d be a lousy dad if I didn’t say, “Dear, you should really rethink this choice in your life.”

ALISON: (Kiss on check) Dad, we’re all just friends.

DAD: Oh really?

ALISON: Yes, we are all going to destroy the world together.

DAD: Ok?

ALISON: I’m going to be empress of the world.

DAD: Empress of the world? Alison, is that really a direction you want to take in your life?

ALISON: Well, I’ve always enjoyed power, you know that. Remember how on sleepovers I would make all my friends do my homework and clean my room. You used to call me your little dictator.

DAD: (laughing to himself) True, true.

ALISON: (Laughing) And I asked for that whip for Christmas.

DAD: (Laughing) How could I forget that?

ALISON: (Laughing) And then after that we had to move to a new town.

DAD: (Laughing) Yes, and we swore we would never talk about what happened.

ALISON: (Slowing down laughing) Good times.

DAD: (Not laughing) But, honey, you majored in communication. You have to recognize that going from being a communication major to dictator with global dreams is quite a leap. And don’t you have a history midterm on the civil war coming up?

ALISON: Oh, crap! I forgot about that.

DAD: And another thing, pumpkin, all this world conquest thing, what does Robert think of this?

ALISON: Robert, don’t talk to me about Robert.

SOUND: Of Mom walking into the room.

MOM: Honey, I don’t mean to complain.

ALISON: What is it mom?

MOM: Your friends have eaten the cat.

ALISON: Really? Fluffy?

DAD: Now, I don’t want to judge, but Robert would never have eaten our pets.

MOM: Robert? Did you two break up?

ALISON: In a way, he just pushed me to the limit. Suddenly, the idea of controlling mankind to make sure they don’t sound as stupid as he does sounded like a good idea.

DAD: But have you thought this through? Taking over the world is not that easy.

ALISON: Well we got this time machine and we are going to go through time crippling mankind until in the future all the binkies are in charge.

DAD: Sounds like a full time job, so what are the hours like?

ALISON: Pretty good actually and you don’t even feel time go by. It’s more than a job, it’s an adventure.

Scene 4

SOUND: Of heavens.

KELLII: Have you tried that button?

MICHAEL: I would rather you didn’t touch… See, there you go! You stopped the transmission.

KELLII: Well, that’s no biggie. You can just touch this button and it’ll jump back into the story.

MICHAEL: Ok, do you want to do this?

KELLII: No, I’m just trying to…

MICHAEL: Then go back to your Stratego game.

KELLII: Actually, right now we both wanted to watch the dinner of Alison and the binkies.

Scene 5

SOUND: Of dinner being served and eaten.

MOM: I’m sorry we don’t have the livers of vanquished foes for you, Smaug.

SMAUG: It’s fine… Like I said, we’ve already eaten.

FOURTH DRAGON: I ate a family of six from down the road.

DAD: On the corner in the red two story?

FOURTH DRAGON: Yes, them.

DAD: The Williams. Honey, he ate the Williams.

MOM: I always thought their house was ugly.

DAD: Red just didn’t seem to work.

FOURTH DRAGON: I agree. It would have looked better as a white house.

DAD: Did you eat their dog too?

FOURTH DRAGON: Yes. Appetizer.

DAD: Good. That dog barks all night.

SMAUG: And I ate a unicorn… That’ll probably hurt later.

SOUND: Doorbell.

MOM: I’ll get it.

SOUND: Mother getting up and moving into other room.

DAD: She’s just going to get the door.

SMAUG: Yes, she said that.

MOM: (Screams, in background)

MEPHIST: (In background) Why does everyone do that? Is Alison here?

MOM: (In background) Honey, it’s a… it’s a…

DAD: What is it, dear?

Scene 6

SOUND: Near door.

MOM: (Calling back) It’s a devil with a head.

JOSEPH: Actually, my name is General Joseph.

MOM: What a nice looking head.

JOSEPH: Madam, I will have you know I am a general in God’s army.

MOM: I bet you are. Isn’t it cute, it talks just like people!

SOUND: Alison walking into living room.

Alison: Oh, no, Mephistopheles. What do you want? The second I am broken up with Robert, you are at my door… I guess there is no surprise there.

SOUND: Of Dad walking into room.

DAD: What is going on here?

ALISON: What part of the words “Restraining Order’ don’t you understand?

MEPHIST: Alison, I’m a devil. How can a restraining order stop me?

DAD: (Sighs) Don’t let it bother you. She has a restraining order on almost everyone in this town.

ALISON: I have nothing to say to you.

MEPHIST: Well, Alison Peters, I didn’t come to just talk to you.

ALISON: Sure, you didn’t. You just came by my house with a talking head to not visit me. Hmmm?

JOSEPH: Actually, can I say something here?

MEPHIST: No… Alison, I want to speak to the binkies.

ALISON: Well, maybe they don’t want to talk to you.

MEPHIST: What? Why?

ALISON: Maybe someone told them about how you treat your girlfriends and they don’t want to talk with someone like that.

MEPHIST: You aren’t still gripping about that are you? I’m evil, Alison. Evil!

ALISON: You just keep telling yourself that if it makes you happy.

SOUND: Door slams!

DAD: Alison, is there something you want to tell me?

ALISON: Not really right now. Let’s go back to dinner.

MEPHIST: (From behind door) How dare you slam your door in the face of the great devil Mephistopheles! I have the winds and flames of Hell at my call

SOUND: Door flies off.

MOM: You destroyed our door?

DAD: You are paying for that Mister.

MEPHIST: Alison! Listen to me! Just because our relationship didn’t work.

DAD: Hold it right there!

ALISON: Dad, I can explain.

DAD: You dated this thing, honey?

MEPHIST: thing?

ALISON: (Sighs) I actually lived with him for two days last year.

MEPHIST: Thing?

MOM: What? And when were you planning to tell us.

SOUND: Of dragons walking into room.

SMAUG: Is everything ok in here.

FOURTH DRAGON: Smaug! It is that devil with the head again.

MEPHIST: Hello boys, I just wanted to come by and see how the Garden of Eden went?

DAD: Just a second everyone. Alison, I didn’t say anything about the three evil binkies. I liked the fact they attacked our neighbors. And I didn’t complain when they ate the cat.

FIFTH DRAGON: Sorry about that.

DAD: But a devil with a talking head who you used to date.

JOSEPH: She didn’t date me.

MOM: Of course, not silly. You don’t have a body.

JOSEPH: Madam, I’ll like you to know I have a great angel body.

MOM: I’m sure you do. He is just so cute! Where can I get one of those?

DAD: Like I was saying, this is too much to take.

SMAUG: Devil, you tried to get us to destroy all of… What did you call it Alison?

ALISON: All of space-time continuum.

SMAUG: Yes, that.

MEPHIST: Now that isn’t true… Oh, granted, everything would have disappeared into oblivion, but it’s not as bad as it sounds.

DAD: I really have no idea what I was going to do.

MOM: Punish her?

ALISON: No way! I’m 20, you can’t punish me. I’m a junior in college.

MEPHIST: Binkies, please I can help, I…

SMAUG: No, we are done listening to you.

ALISON: Dad, I’ll walk out this door and you’ll never see me again if you try to punish me.

DAD: Don’t threaten me little lady.

ALISON: Little lady? I’m going to control the world!

DAD: Not if you are punished.

MEPHIST: I am the devil Mephistopheles, you will listen to me, binkies!

JOSEPH: Oh, shut up.

MEPHIST: You shut up.

JOSEPH: I’m a general in the army of God and you don’t see me acting all high and mighty.

MEPHIST: You don’t act high and mighty? You forget, I’ve spent the last three days with you!

ALISON: Just try and punish me!

MOM: That’s it! Everyone shut up!

PAUSE.

MOM: There, now let’s all going to the living room and discuss this like adults.

Scene 7

SOUND: Of Heaven. Pager going off.

KELLII: Not again, my pager.

MICHAEL: What? Who is it?

KELLII: It’s my dad.

MICHAEL: Oh, no.

KELLII: He’s being paging me left and right ever since he caught me on that date.

REPAIR ANGEL: By the way, what did you see in him.

MICHAEL: What is that supposed to mean?

KELLII: When we were exchanging pictures on the internet, they didn’t look like him at all.

MICHAEL: They were me. I was just younger then, that’s all.

REPAIR ANGEL: That explains everything.

KELLII: I don’t understand.

REPAIR ANGEL: I wondered how he got the pictures of you to start that website?

KELLII: Website? What are you talking about?

MICHAEL: (Trying to distract) Kellii! What does your father say on the pager?

KELLII: The usual about killing you after his assignment is done.

MICHAEL: But you are of legal age… I mean, you are, right?

KELLII: Yeah, I am.

MICHAEL: (Whew)

KELLII: I was just held back a few years in high school.

REPAIR ANGEL: You are still in high school?

KELLII: Yeah.

REPAIR ANGEL: Did he know that when he asked you out?

KELLII: Yeah, I think he did.

REPAIR ANGEL: Kinky.

MICHAEL: Now I can explain everything, I am sure…

SOUND: Pager going off again.

KELLII: It’s my dad again.

MICHAEL: (Sarcastic) Great.

KELLII: Looks like you are off the hook for a little while.

MICHAEL: Really good.

KELLII: He is going to the High Angel Committee to have you fired first and then he is going to kill you.

MICHAEL: What?

REPAIR ANGEL: (Laughing) The High Angels? Oh, they are going to get a kick out of this.

MICHAEL: They can’t fire me! I need a chance to argue my case.

KELLII: You have got to relax there, Angel.

MICHAEL: Relax? Yeah, you are right. They won’t do anything. There is a beaucracy in place. The beaucracy and the paperwork will save me. It would be too much work to get rid of me.

KELLII: And you do good work, right? I mean you keep an eye on things.

MICHAEL: What? I have no clue! They’ve been looking for an excuse to fire me ever since that Dante Experience incident.

REPAIR ANGEL: Whoa, that was you!

MICHAEL: Argh.

REPAIR ANGEL: I just thought your name was similar, I didn’t know it was you.

MICHAEL: I don’t want to talk about it.

REPAIR ANGEL: Yeah, you can kiss your job goodbye.

MICHAEL: Ah, your holiness, (fake laughing), how about we stop joking around and go back to Alison and her parents and the devil and the binkies. I’m sure her parents are doing their best to stop all this evil from happening. Yup, I’m sure they are making everything ok.

Scene 8

SOUND:  In living room.

MOM: Ok, so we are at an agreement. You binkies will go with Alison through time to try and take over the world in the future.

SMAUG: Yes.

FIFTH DRAGON: I like this plan.

MOM: You devil, will go and distract the group from Heaven from stopping the dragons.

MEPHIST: Yes, excellent plan, Mrs. P.

DAD: And you’ll find some time to study for your history midterm.

ALISON: I said I would, Dad.

MOM: Good.

JOSEPH: I think you should really listen to me about this, Mrs. Peters.

MOM: Not now… (Light cough) And you husband, will recognize that your daughter is no longer a child and can make the decisions she wants to in her life.

DAD: Yes, I see that now.

ALISON: Oh, Dad.

DAD: Give me a hug, pumpkin.

SOUND: Of Hug.

EVERYONE: Awwww….

SMAUG: That was really sweet.

DAD: You have fun to taking over the world.

ALISON: Yes, dad.

DAD: And dress warm.

ALISON: Oh dad.

MOM: There now everything is settled. Does anyone want any cake?

MEPHIST: Me!

JOSEPH: Me too.

SMAUG: Thanks, Mrs. Peters.

FIFTH DRAGON: Yummm, cake.

Scene 9

SOUND: Of Heaven.

KELLII:  Well, let’s get back to the game.

REPAIR ANGEL: Stratego, yeah.

MICHAEL: Can you two please be quiet… Ok, sirness, it seems Alison’s mom has given some much needed direction to the evil side. She even gave them cake!… My head really hurts. And we still have no idea what is going on with our team of heroes. Right now, Susan, Will, Steve, Robert, Dante, Jenkins and Sir Lancelot are lost in time. They could be anywhere.

Scene 10

SOUND: Of a tropical forest with a beach in the background.

WILL: Where are we?

ROBERT: For the last time, Will they don’t know. Susan broke the time machine.

JENKINS: Well, wherever we are it is nice. Very beautiful tropical beach.

SUSAN: I didn’t break the time machine. And even if I did it was all Steve’s fault!

STEVE: My fault. What did I do?

SUSAN: You slept with Eve! Eve!

STEVE: There was no sleeping involved…

LANCELOT: What does the device say, Miss Susan?

SUSAN: Nothing, Lance, nothing… We could be anywhere… And we had them. We actually had them. They were right there…

ROBERT What are you talking about, you ran.

SUSAN: That was, ah,  to confuse them.

ROBERT: Well, you did a fine good job.

SUSAN: Well, maybe if you didn’t upset Alison so she changed sides and didn’t convince the binkies to leave us behind and…

ROBERT: Don’t say it, Susan… Don’t you dare blame me for that!

SUSAN: You drove her to wanting to destroy humanity!

ROBERT: Alison, has been upset before, it’s no big deal.

SUSAN: Robert, she didn’t just want to hurt you… She just didn’t want to slap you… She just didn’t want to kill you… She WANTS to destroy all life as we know it!

PAUSE

ROBERT: So she has issues.

SUSAN: (Sighs…)

STEVE: Let’s try to get a grip on the situation folks. Does anything in the tropical forest look familiar to anyone?

LANCELOT: No.

DANTE: No

JENKINS: No.

ROBERT: No.

SUSAN: No.

Will: No… But I really like the nude beach over there.

STEVE: So we are totally lost and… What did you say Will?

WILL: Over there, between those trees. It’s a nude beach. Don’t tell me you guys, didn’t see it. We’ve been walking alongside it for the last ten minutes… hello… Why do you think, I’ve been quiet.

LANCELOT: Those people are without clothes.

STEVE: This is the best week ever!

DANTE: A nude beach?

JENKINS: Oh, no! Dante you are keeping them on!

DANTE: You can’t stop me!

SOUND: Clothes ripping off!

DANTE: Freedom! Yaha!

SOUND: Dante running away down beach, giggling.

SUSAN: I really didn’t need to see that.

JENKINS: You’re telling me, sister?

SUSAN: Ok, everyone, back to work, we need to stick together and try to get this time device to work and… Ok, where’s Steve?

WILL: He’s already gone over there by those women…. Wait a minute, does anyone else feel a cold chill down their back.

SUSAN: What?

LANCELOT: Yes, I do too.

DEATH: Hello everyone.

ALL: Death!

WILL: You can’t take me! I’m immortal! I’m immortal and you can’t touch me.

DEATH: I know Will. I read the memo.

JENKINS: Why are you here, Death?

DEATH: Oh, someone put something in the fishsticks at the beachside bar over there. So I thought I would take a breather here on the beach before dinner is served. It’s not often I get to relax.

JENKINS: Did you say bar? Well, I’m getting a drink.

SOUND: Jenkins flying away.

DEATH: (Calling) Don’t eat the fishsticks. (Normal) So how is everything with all of you?

WILL: We are trying to save all of reality.

DEATH: You don’t say? From what?

WILL: Binkies!

DEATH: Really, actual Binkies?

SUSAN: You haven’t seen any of them around?

DEATH: No. Who else is here? I see Steve. Is Alison here too?

ROBERT: I’m going…

SUSAN: Robert, I’m sorry for blaming you!

WILL: Stay, Robert!

DEATH: What is wrong with him?

WILL: Oh, it’s a long story.

DEATH: He dropped something… It looks like a ring box.

Scene 11

SOUND: Of Robert walking

ROBERT: (Talking to himself) I can’t believe this I really can’t… It can’t get worse from here.

SOUND: (Of another walking they bump into each other).

ROBERT: Sorry.

LATER ROBERT: No problem.

ROBERT: Ah…

LATER ROBERT: Oh, no.

ROBERT: What? You’re me.

PAUSE

BOTH ROBERTS: (Sarcastic) Oh, great.

END CREDITS

Closer

SOUND: Of Beach.

WILL: Really, Susan, you should try and relax.

LANCELOT: Stop playing with the time traveling device, my fair Susan. Will is right. You should relax.

WILL: You should lie out on the beach.

LANCELOT: Or swim

SUSAN: Well, maybe you are right and… Wait a minute! This is not a trick to get me naked is it?

PAUSE

WILL AND LANCELOT: (Both clearly lying, sheepish) No.

 

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