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The Stories of Scott D. Southard

  • In Jerry’s Corner
  • A Jane Austen Daydream
  • Permanent Spring Showers
  • Megan
  • Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare
  • The Dante 3
  • Me Stuff
  • Man Behind the Curtain
  • December 9, 2014

    Forward to Christmas Past! Christmas Blogposts to Check Out…

    Santa on his SleighThere are a few things that I really enjoy writing about.

    A favorite author or book? Bring it on! A television show I like to watch? Sure. Something odd going on in my life? Well, within reason of course. I do like to keep some privacy. There is a line there and certainly someday I will find it.

    One of the things I get a kick out of each year is Christmas. Heck, I even wrote a bad Christmas song on this site in the past (here). Let me add to that- One of my favorite pieces of fiction I have ever done is a holiday movie screenplay. I still dream someday I can sell that script and see it made.

    This holiday just gets me going. Basically, it is the artistic equivalent of drinking one too many glasses of hot chocolate. Here are some of the blogposts I have done about my favorite holiday. Enjoy!

    The New Kid in the Audience: A Holiday Confessional. One of the first things I ever wrote for the internet was about Christmas. Want proof? Here you go. It’s my own agnostic/atheist view on a holiday I love. With a helping of Snoopy throw in for good measure.

    Book Review: A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. I’ve done over 30 reviews on my local NPR station now, but this is easily one of my favorites. I have always loved this book and it really gave me a chance to share that love. Also, I got to read selections from the book. Check it out! You can even hear me do Tiny Tim!

    Losing the Grinch: When I Became a Who. On a Christmas Eve, my house was broken into and all the Christmas presents and electronics were stolen. My oldest child was only a month old at the time, so it would not leave emotional scars for him, but it is something his parents will never forget. When I was a kid I used to have trouble falling asleep on Christmas Eve because of the excitement, now it is a very different feeling each year.

    The Littlest Angel Is the Worst Holiday Story… Ever. Yes, the holiday story gauntlet has been thrown down and this is the worst in my opinion out there. Oh, it is so, so bad. The fact that people still read this every  year gives me the shivers. Seriously, I am shivering right now.

    The Christmas Accordion: Holiday 2012 Thoughts. I had just finished seeing the first Hobbit film and was sitting in a coffee shop with my dad when I heard about the shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary. My son was almost the same age as many of the victims. This post is about how Christmas should feel in a school, or at least how it did for me.

    Neil Diamond’s “A Cherry Cherry Christmas” is the Worst Christmas Song Ever! A Holiday Musical Rant. I know, I know, Neil Diamond fans, I know. This is Mr. Diamond referencing his own work. But that doesn’t change the fact that this song is so utterly bad and inappropriate. You don’t believe me that this is the worst holiday song? Go ahead and read my post and then listen to it. If you have real courage, watch the video.

    Writing a Good Christmas Story: Four Things to Consider. This is my most recent post on the holiday and here I put my writing educator hat on, trying to lay down some ground rules for what makes a Christmas story work… because honestly, most holiday stories don’t.

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  • November 26, 2014

    Buy Books for Black Friday and Cyber Monday!

    If you enjoy my blog or my books why not consider sharing the love with other readers? I promise that they have each been painstakingly constructed to fit in stockings and under trees…

    A Jane Austen Daydream

    A Jane Austen DaydreamAll her heroines find love in the end–but is there love waiting for Jane?

    Jane Austen spends her days writing and matchmaking in the small countryside village of Steventon, until a ball at Godmersham Park propels her into a new world where she yearns for a romance of her own. But whether her heart will settle on a young lawyer, a clever Reverend, a wealthy childhood friend, or a mysterious stranger is anyone’s guess.

    Written in the style of Jane herself, this novel ponders the question faced by many devoted readers over the years–did she ever find love? Weaving fact with fiction, it re-imagines her life, using her own stories to fill in the gaps left by history and showing that all of us–to a greater or lesser degree–are head over heels for Jane.

    You can find it in the following formats:

    • Print version for $13.25 on Amazon (here)
    • eBook for Kindle for only $3.99 (here)
    • The NEW audiobook on Audible.com (here) or iTunes

    Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare

    Maximilian Standforth and the Case of the Dangerous Dare, CoverThe cursed and foreboding McGregor Castle is the most terrifying and haunted location in all of the British Empire. Only a brave (or foolish) soul would consider visiting it, let alone staying within its walls for five days. In other words, a perfect dare for a man like Maximilian Standforth!

    Maximilian Standforth, famed playboy aristocrat and private detective, is a genius with dangerous tastes. With Bob (his trusty carriage driver, biographer, and bodyguard) and Maggie Collins (actress, spy, and maid) by his side, Maximilian will experience horrors and madness unlike any seen before. For it is at McGregor Castle that the team will discover more than they ever could imagine in this very experimental and genre-breaking thriller.

    You can find it in the following formats:

    • In print for just $9.49 via Amazon (here)
    • An eBook for Kindle at the low prices of $3.99 (here)

    My Problem With Doors

    My Problem With DoorsJacob is lost in time.

    He has been that way ever since he was a child for doors don’t work for him like they do for the rest of us. A door can take him to the past or the future, into any house, into any country. This  is Jacob’s plea for help.

    This novel is an unpredictable adventure filled with thrills, romance, horror, and even the occasional cameo from historical figures like Lord Byron and Jack the Ripper.

    It is available as:

    • Print for $15.75 on Amazon (here)
    • A NEW eBook edition(!) with an exclusive afterword for just $9.99 on Kindle (here)

    Megan

    MeganThis is the story of Megan Wane.

    To me and you, she is just a normal worker in a drab office, but in her imagination there exists an entire world, one she has escaped into ever since she was a child. It is the land of Prosperity and it is filled with dragons, castles, trolls, moon people, and wizards, And in Prosperity, Megan is a princess and a super hero.

    This is the story of her worst day and how Prosperity saved the real her.

    It is out now as:

    • Print for $15.95 on Amazon (here)
    • A NEW eBook edition including an exclusive preface by the author (me). It is $9.99 for Kindle (here)

    Me Stuff

    Me Stuff, front coverThieves, psychics, evil poets, mad men, car companies, literary greats, tornadoes, models, vasectomies, bankers, children, Satanists, princesses, truckers, comics, rock stars, strippers, superheroes…

    This is a new collection of some of the most popular blogposts from this very site! Made for both the fan and the newbie, this book has something for everyone… Well, except for those who don’t like entertaining stories. This book can’t help those people.

    You can find it as:

    • In print for just $8.99 via Amazon (here)
    • As an eBook for only $3.99 for Kindle (here)

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  • November 25, 2014

    Five Things I Am Into Right Now, November 2014

    BoredI am suffering the case of the blahs. Oh, this is not a bad thing related to my life or anything, this is related to books. I’ve done the book reviews for my local NPR station now for over a year and half. That is over 30 books. (You can listen and read my reviews via the links on this page of my site.)

    See, I’m struggling through a book review by a very popular author. Some people will love the book, I am certain; others will hate it. Me, I’m just mildly disappointed and that is what gives me the blahs.

    Let me start this over… I love writing a good book review. There is nothing more fun for me as a reviewer than breaking down a good book, introducing it to a listener/reader and discussing why the high points are the high points. Talking about good books is my soapbox and I like being on it, thank you very much!

    I am not Dorothy Parker. She used to take a glee in writing a bad review. Me, I find it disappointing. I can do it certainly, and they are easy to do, but they do not give me pleasure. Also, I like to say more than simply “I don’t like it.” I go out of my way to explain why something doesn’t work. Okay, this could be argued as a second soapbox, but not as big or important as the other one.

    But there are no soapboxes when the book is a blah, middle-of-the road, half-a-shoulder-shrug. In a way, I see this blah around me in the environment too, as all the days are gray and getting colder. Of course, the review will be written in a week or so and my life will go on. I can’t guarantee anything regarding the weather.

    Let’s move on to happier thoughts! Here are the five things I think are awesome right now. (more…)

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  • November 20, 2014

    “Fresh, funny and wonderfully evocative” The Review takes on A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM

    EmmaWe all know that Sally Field moment when she won the Oscar. Yeah, it was over thirty years ago, but people still quote it and it appears on TV from time to time. There she is on screen happily declaring “You like me! You really like me!”

    Well, that is how I feel after this new book review from the website The Review. It is a very well-crafted review and, for me the author, so very, very satisfying. Because, this reader obviously got everything I was attempting to do in the work. Yup, I went all Sally Field. Here is what the reviewer said about Jane:

    Southard’s research is solid but not intrusive and he really succeeds in placing Jane in the story. He brings her into vibrant, appealing life, crafting a living, breathing woman of many dimensions and by populating her world with characters real and imagined, he creates a village rife with gossip, intrigue and quiet excitement.

    I don’t want to share more from the review, just point you to the link. You need to check it out! Seriously, go— You can find it online here.

    Audible Book Cover_A Jane Austen DaydreamPublished by Madison Street Publishing, A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM can be purchased in print ($13.46) or as an eBook for the outrageously low price of $3.99 for Kindle. You can find it on Amazon here (http://amzn.com/B00CH3HQUU).

    You can find the fantastic audiobook version on Audible and iTunes.

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  • October 31, 2014

    Super Neat! A New Book Trailer for A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM!

    Earlier this month, A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM was released as an audiobook, narrated by the incredibly talented Louisa Gummer.  She has also produced this wonderful trailer for the book, which I think really captures the mood and vibe of it. I really like it. Check it out!

    You can also check out the video on Vimeo (here) and Facebook (here).

    Please share it with your friends and fellow readers!

    I would love for more people to discover this novel.Audible Book Cover_A Jane Austen Daydream

    Published by Madison Street Publishing, A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM can be purchased in print ($13.46) or as an eBook for the outrageously low price of $3.99 for Kindle. You can find it on Amazon here (http://amzn.com/B00CH3HQUU).

    The fantastic audiobook version can find it on Audible and iTunes.

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  • October 28, 2014

    Ghosts, Snoopy, Haunted Mansions and Halloween

    haunted-mansionA few years ago, the inventive filmmaker Guillermo del Toro was hired by Disney to write a screenplay for a new movie based on The Haunted Mansion ride.  Over the summer I read an interview with him claiming that him and his team of writers were still struggling with the story.

    Seriously?

    I have to admit I am a little surprised. I mean it seems to me a Haunted Mansion film writes itself. Do you want to know how I would do it if Disney asked me? Of course you do!

    First off I would set it in the 1950s. That way you can tap into the cliches and stereotypes you would see in classic old black-and-white horror films. And set it in a small town (think Back to the Future).  Now on to my very brief synopsis!

    • Act 1- We meet the eccentric and comic people in the town. There are two twin teenage sisters, one is a cheerleader and popular, the other is a bookworm (our heroes). They go to a dance at their school. That night there is a huge thunderstorm and the power goes out. A bunch of teenagers ride together in car; which, of course, stalls in front of the Haunted Mansion.
    • Act 2- The group of teenagers (including our female heroes) tour the Haunted Mansion. The ghosts want to get out but are trapped in (a curse put in place by Madame Leota). One of the teenagers is tricked by the evil Hatbox Ghost (an urban legend by the way around the ride), releasing all the ghosts.
    • Act 3- The ghosts playfully attack and spook the town (like Gremlins). The teenagers are split into teams, one to collect the ghosts, the other to get the curse put back on the house and stop the Hatbox Ghost (the sisters lead the different teams)… this all has to be done by dawn.
    • Act 4- In a suspenseful last act, the curse is reinstated, the ghosts are drawn back and the sisters now are friends. The end.

    Disney you can send me the check. (Okay, that was a little snippy of me, but seriously I could write this script and would love to do it… Oh, and Guillermo del Toro is awesome.)

    Here are some of the posts in the past I have written about Halloween. Enjoy!

    The Halloween TreeBook Review: The Halloween Tree by Ray Bradbury. Last year I reviewed this book (which should be a holiday classic) for WKAR’s Current State. You can check it out (and listen) via the link. This week I’ll be reviewing Frankenstein by Mary Shelley. I hope you tune in for it, I think it turned out great.

    It's The Great PumpkinWatching It’s The Great  Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. I love this special. Absolutely love it. Actually, I’m kind of obsessed about it, and this post proves it. In it, I share my insight on the show and my thoughts on each of the scenes and characters. Seriously… obsessed.

    CostumedIf I Could Wear a Halloween Costume… If I had the courage, I would dress up on the holiday. I’m just not that guy… but I wish I was. This comic post deals with my dreams and hopes and masks.

    HalloweenHalloween, In Spirit. I wrote this post during my first year on the site, and it was one of my most popular. It is a little comic, a little philosophical, a little serious. In many ways it contains all of my thoughts on the holiday, tied up in a bow… that probably has skeletons on it.

    I hope you enjoy the posts! (And Guillermo call me!)

     

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  • October 24, 2014

    Fingers Forever Crossed

    So yesterday I got this really cool image in my e-mail….

    IMG_4023-1

    The picture is from Clare who is the person handling the marketing for my new book Permanent Spring Showers (set to be published in early 2015 by 5 Prince Books).  They are going full in with the book and are hitting many of the bigger book reviewers with a galley copy, like The New York Times in the pic.

    I would love it if the New York Times picked up the book and read it. I’m not sure exactly what my chances will be, I’m sure they get drowned in galley copies of new books each day. But this image definitely put a spring in my step yesterday… what can I say? I had to share it. It is just awesome, and for me the stuff that dreams are made of.

    I hope to have the release date for the book for you soon. Stay tuned…

    Until then... have you entered the book giveaway for my novel My Problem With Doors? Two lucky readers will win an autographed copy of my novel (which was just recently released for the Kindle with an exclusive afterword- here). The competition on GoodReads.com ends on October 28. You can enter by clicking below.

    Goodreads Book Giveaway

    My Problem with Doors by Scott D. Southard

    My Problem with Doors

    by Scott D. Southard

    Giveaway ends October 28, 2014.

    See the giveaway details
    at Goodreads.

    Enter to win

    AND that is not all! The audiobook for A Jane Austen Daydream was just released. You can find it on Audible and iTunes!  I’m in awe of the performance Louisa Gummer did in the recording.  I hope you will check it out.  No wait… correct that… you need to check it out (and there are samples on both sites!). Definitely just the thing for roadtrips, iPods, iPhones or lazy afternoons.

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  • October 23, 2014

    “Inspiration” Author Susan Jordan writing about A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM

    One of the unexpected joys I have experienced since the publication of A Jane Austen Daydream is discovering the impact that my book has on some of its readers.

    I have received numerous e-mails, tweets, and Facebook messages from readers. For example, I received an e-mail from one reader who wanted me to know she was re-reading the book while sitting in Jane Austen’s garden in Chawton.

    You save e-mails like that, let me tell you.

    Author Susan Jordan (Eli’s Heart) tweeted to me yesterday about how she finished the book in one day and then wrote a 5-star review of it on Amazon! She has gone on to write a post on her site about how the book has impacted her own writing and life. Her post is called “I Read This Book…” Here is an excerpt from the editorial:

    His book, A Jane Austen Daydream, looked intriguing, so I ordered the e-book and lost myself for many hours in the wonderful world he created. What I read was the most charming mixture of fact and fantasy I believe I’ve ever read and was utterly delightful. More than that, he gave voice to Jane Austen’s deep emotional feelings about writing, and reduced me to tears and inspired me at the same time.

    You can read the entire post via her site (here). I hope you will check it out. And Susan, I am glad you enjoyed my book!

    Audible Book Cover_A Jane Austen DaydreamPublished by Madison Street Publishing, A JANE AUSTEN DAYDREAM can be purchased in print ($13.46) or as an eBook for the outrageously low price of $3.99 for Kindle. You can find it on Amazon here (http://amzn.com/B00CH3HQUU). It has also just recently been released as an audiobook! Narrated by the amazing Louisa Gummer, you can find it on Audible and iTunes.

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  • October 22, 2014

    Only a little while left! Enter to win an autographed copy of MY PROBLEM WITH DOORS!

    On October 28, the giveaway for MY PROBLEM WITH DOORS ends on Goodreads.com. Two lucky readers will win an autographed copy of this surprising time-travel novel.

    Jacob is lost in time. He has been that way ever since he was a child for doors don’t work for him like they do for the rest of us. A door can take him to the past or the future, into any house, into any country. MY PROBLEM WITH DOORS is Jacob’s plea for help. This novel is an unpredictable adventure filled with thrills, romance, horror, and even the occasional cameo from historical figures like Lord Byron and Jack the Ripper.

    You can enter by clicking below.

    Goodreads Book Giveaway

    My Problem with Doors by Scott D. Southard

    My Problem with Doors

    by Scott D. Southard

    Giveaway ends October 28, 2014.

    See the giveaway details
    at Goodreads.

    Enter to win

    MY PROBLEM WITH DOORS was published by I Publish Press and was just recently released for the Kindle, with a brand new (and exclusive) afterword by me. You can find it on amazon here.

    If you would like to learn more about the work you can check out a sample (here) or find more info via this page on the site.

    “This is a most compelling book. It pulls you in to a fascinating concept from the beginning…. I give this book 5 stars.” -The Voracious Reader

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  • October 14, 2014

    Five Things I Am Into Right Now, October 2014

    It's The Great PumpkinSo I have to accept the fact my kids are not going to be into the Peanuts. I truly see the generational gap there. While I can write a post dissecting the interworking genius of It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown (which I did do here), my kids would rather watch something else.

    Actually, my son had a really good answer for not wanting to watch the show. He said they used bad language. Which is true, if you consider the word “stupid” a bad word, as we try to do in our house.

    And while my son loves looking at my old comics (especially Calvin & Hobbes), he has no interest in looking at Peanuts. So while I’m busy each year collecting the complete works (thanks to the releases by Fantagraphics Books), my old paperback copies sit gathering dust on his shelves. Once I tried reading him the books and he was startled by them.

    “Why are they so mean to Charlie Brown?”

    “Well, it’s…”

    Now how would you answer that? Is it funny to be mean to someone? Are we laughing at a child’s pain? In our age of fighting bullying, is Charlie Brown a victim? Granted, in the later years of Schulz’s writing, Charlie Brown took a back seat and much of his torture disappeared (usually everything seemed to be about Rerun), but it is there in the early years tenfold.

    In the next year we’ll be getting a new Charlie Brown movie. The trailer looks beautiful, but I wonder how they will handle this stuff. It could either be a rebirth for the franchise or the final nail in the coffin. When Charles Schulz died he made it very clear he wanted everything to stop after his passing. His family seems to have done everything possible to keep it going though; yet, a part of me believes Schulz had it right. Especially now.

    Now on to my October list! (more…)

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